The term Prostitute doesn’t typically come up in polite conversation. It does however in popular culture, usually in it’s slang form, “ho”. In fact “ho” is used quite liberally and casually in music, movies and by kids talking on the bus.
So what is all this “Ho” business? Do they really mean the Prostitute archetype when referring to someone as a “Ho”? I looked up the definition from the slang website Urban Dictionary (Warning – this site does contain much foul language). Below is the 3rd listed definition:
Ho (noun): Anyone who dehumanizes themselves by selling their soul to others. The term can be applied to either a man or a woman or–as in the case of <Anne Coulter>–both.
Aspersions on Ms Coulter aside (although it did make me giggle), the definition is spot-on for the Prostitute archetype in it’s shadow aspect. So it seems the terms don’t differ in their meaning but I believe that there is a much better, more productive way of looking at this archetype.
The Prostitute is one of the four survival archetypes which we all have. You, Me, the barista at the cafe and yes even Ann Coulter (ok, I’ll leave her alone for a while) – we all have a Prostitute archetypal pattern working somewhere in our lives. The Prostitute archetype is our negotiator. It is also a signpost of our level of faith in ourselves.
We all negotiate ourselves one way or the other – much of the time it comes down to how we feel about ourselves in the situation. Sometimes it’s a case of selling out or selling up. So as with any archetype, we meet it in both it’s light and shadow incarnations.
To find the Prostitute archetype one only needs to look to the moments when we feel our faith in ourselves slipping away. Be it in our job, relationships, finance or shopping for shoes, the Prostitute archetype can go looking for something to trade away to feel safe again. Minor or major, situations like these come upon us again and again:
- We withhold our opinion because we fear being judged. What this does however, is make their opinion more important than ours.
- We stay late at work, neglecting our personal life in order to feel more secure in our job. Is the job important? Of course it is, but when this negotiation is based on fear, we are more likely to sell out which is not an empowered position.
- We stay in a relationship that has gone bad in order to have someone in our life. – OR – We neglect our own needs because we are afraid that it might lead to a break up, a fight or more work than we want to deal with.
We sell our happiness, peace and honesty for what often times is just a flimsy sense of safety. Sadly these things tend to pile up and create an ugly reckoning later on.
So how do we not become a ‘ho’ in these situations? Awareness is the first step - it can be a doozy – but it’s the doorway to better choices.
- Be on the lookout for this pattern in your life.
- Look at when it comes up and why.
- What situations trigger it?
- What are some alternatives to the un-empowered behaviors and choices that it can tempt you with?
The role of the Prostitute is to alert us when we are losing faith in ourselves. Use it as a ‘poke in the arm’ to remind you that you have the ability to shore up faith and confidence in yourself. The empowered Prostitute archetype imbues a sense of worth, faith and confidence.